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Shared by Mary Jean
Terrell..........
Subject: What it means to love a soldier...
FORT HOOD, Texas, Oct. 8, 2003 -- She stands in line at the post office
waiting to send a package to her husband, a U.S. Army soldier serving in
Kuwait.
Envelopes, pens, paper, stamps, sunscreen, eye-drops, gum, batteries,
powdered
Gatorade, baby wipes and Tweezers.
He said he needed the sunscreen and baby wipes. She threw in the
Tweezers. There's a common bond at the post office in this military
town. People aren't
just sending letters and packages; they are sending smiles, hope, love
and just
a touch of home. People look around at the others, sharing their
concern,
fear and pride. They take comfort knowing they are not alone.
Passing through the gate leaving the Army post, she enters another
world. A
world filled with pawnshops, surplus stores, barbershops, fast food
galore and,
of course, "Loans, Loans, Loans."
This is a life that includes grocery shopping at a place called the
Commissary. A life that has her venturing to the Post Exchange, referred
to as the PX,
instead of heading to Wal-Mart. This is where you come to learn,
appreciate
and respect the ceremonious traditions of Reveille and Retreat, and of
course,
the National Anthem from a completely different perspective.
At 6 a.m., or as the soldiers call it, 0600 hours, Reveille can be heard
across post. The bugle call officially begins the military workday. At
1700 hours
Retreat sounds signaling the day's end. Soldiers render salutes, chatter
fades
and all eyes are drawn to the nearest flag. At 2300 hours, the bugle
sounds
Taps, denoting not only the "final hour" of the day, but also honoring
those we
have lost.
When the national anthem plays in a military town, a special aura fills
the
air. Men, women, and even children stop to pay their respects. Civilians
place
their hands over their hearts. Soldiers salute. In this world, the
anthem
isn't just a prequel to the echo of "Play Ball."
Since she married her soldier and experienced the Star Spangled Banner
from
this perspective, she's noticed how people in civilian towns react to
the
national anthem. She notices the people who continue to talk, the hats
that stay
on, the beer that doesn't get put down, and even the jeers at the person
singing
the anthem. The meaning seems to be lost to a majority of people. But if
she
looks closely, she can see who has been blessed enough to learn this
lesson.
Some are grandparents, some are parents, and some are young children.
At first glance, children growing up in this world of artillery, tanks
and
uniforms are the same as any other kids from any other town. They do the
things
that kids do. They play sports, go to school, and play with their
friends. The
difference is that their group of friends may change once a year, or
more,
due to a change of duty station. They don't have any say in this. They
could be
two years old and not remember a thing about it, or they may be 16 years
old
getting ready for prom and having to up-root and move again. They're
known as
"military brats," a harsh misnomer for those who learn a lifestyle of
sacrifice at such a young age. Yet, it makes them strong.
The little boys become the men of the house and the little girls become
the
ladies. They adapt to these different situations. They live with the
reality
that one, or even both parents, may not be around to celebrate birthdays
and
holidays. They know there will be will be times when they will look into
the
stands during Little League games and see only an empty space in the
bleachers.
At the same time, these kids have a sense of overwhelming pride. They
brag
about their daddies and their mommies being the best of the best. They
know
their Mom's been through deployments, changes of duty stations, and the
ever >
changing schedules Army life brings. While Dad is away, she takes care
of the
house, the bills, the cars, the dogs, and the baby.
To cope with it all, she learns military families communicate via the
Internet so he doesn't miss out on what's happening back home. But he
does miss out.
He won't be there for the baby's first steps, and he may have to hear
his son
or daughter's first words through a time delay across a static-filled
telephone line.
She remembers what it was like before he left, when everything seemed
"normal." Normal except for the pressed uniform, the nightly ritual of
shining boots,
the thunder-like sound of the Apache helicopters flying overhead, and
the
artillery shells heard off in the distance. OK, relatively normal - when
they
occasionally went to the park, spent holidays together and even enjoyed
four day
weekends when he could get a pass. But, the real challenge began with
the
phone call. She relives the moments before she kissed him goodbye. A
phone
ringing at 0400 hours is enough to make her heart end up in her throat.
They've been
expecting the call, but they weren't sure when it would come. She waits
to
hear the words, "Don't worry, it's just a practice run." But instead she
hears,
"Here we go." So, off he goes to pack, though most of the packing is
finished
because as a soldier, he is "always ready to roll." She gets the baby,
but
leaves his pajamas on because it is just a! s well that he sleeps. She
takes the
dogs out, she gets dressed, all the while trying to catch glimpses of
her
husband. She wants to cherish his presence because she doesn't know when
she'll
see him again. She knows that in other homes nearby, other families are
enacting
exactly the same scene.
Within 15 minutes, the family is in the car heading to the "rally
point." As
they pull up, they see soldiers everywhere, hugging their loved ones.
While
people love to see tearful, joyous homecomings, fearful, anxious,
farewells are
another story. Too soon, with his gear over his shoulder, he walks away.
She
is left behind, straining to keep an eye on her soldier. As the
camouflage
starts to blend, only his walk distinguishes him from the others. She
takes one
last look and takes a deep breath. She reminds herself she must stay
strong. No
tears. Or, as few tears as possible. Just words of encouragement to the
children, to her friends and to herself. Then she turns, walks back to
the car, and
makes her way home to a house that is now eerily quiet.
She mentally prepares for the days, weeks, even months ahead. She needs
to
focus on taking care of her love while he is overseas. Her main
priorities will
be the care packages, phone calls, e-mails, and letters sprayed with
perfume.
And, she can't forget to turn the stamp upside down to say, "I love
Army wife to do these things without a second thought. At the ripe old
age of
22, she knows the younger wives will turn to her for advice. "How do you
balance a checkbook? How do you change a tire? When are they coming
home?" Only when
she knows everyone else is OK, the bills are paid, the cars maintained,
the
lawn cut, the kids asleep, the pets calmed down, and the lights are off,
does
she take time for her self.
Alone at night, she runs the next day's events over in her mind to make
sure
it will all get finished. She reviews her checklist of things to do,
things to
buy for his care package. Once again, she checks the calendar to count
down
the days. Before turning in, she checks to make sure the ringer is on
for the
late night phone call that might come in from overseas. Before she falls
asleep, a few tears hit the pillow. But even as the tears escape,
strength enters >
her mind, body, spirit and soul. She remembers why she is here. She
remembers
the pride and the love that brought her here in the first place, and a
sense of
peace comes over her, replacing, if only for a second, the loneliness,
the
fear and the lingering heartache she feels while her soul mate is away.
This is what it means to love a soldier.
She wouldn't have it any other way
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